The Bracelet

I made this bracelet a few months ago, It was initially for binges. 

I planned to look at it when I felt I had to keep going and it'd remind me I don't need it because I'm beautiful and strong. It didn't work. I wore the bracelet everyday anyway.

The story of the bracelet:

the black T is for the first letter of my name, the heart is to tell me to love myself, and the pink beads represent my inner child. I used the inner child because there was this article I read on eating disorders about how if you were standing in front of yourself as a child, would you give them what you have now or would you want them to be healthy? I chose that I'd want myself to be healthy. I wanted to represent that and my favorite color as a child was pink, so I made the beads pink.

The bracelet had meaning but it didn't have a meaning. It felt like an empty piece of plastic because it wasn't doing what I wanted it to do.

Now I look at it and it has a meaning. But not the meaning I intended it for. It's there to remind me of those two most important words. That I am beautiful as myself, that I can't have the ideal perfect body and that's okay. I'm strong because no matter how many times I fall walking along this road to recovery, I'll get right back up and keep walking-even if I break my ankle.

I just have to push more meaning into the bracelet and believe it more along the journey.